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Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips
a yellow ribbon means something.
The children of McCoy School...
Lord, that was funny. Your mama was something else.
I mean, come on now. Come on, honey. I'm trying to help y'all.
Oliver, thank you so much.
And as she started laboring...
'Scuse me, sir. You look like a nice man.
- I'm so sorry. - It's fine.
And the Bible say in second Deuteronomo...
- Mama, he got her fired. - That's all right. I'm upset too.
Hell, I hope so.
I saw the Klan today. That ain't the Klan.
I'm gonna open the door. Y'all need fresh air up in here.
Thank you. I'm looking for women's lingerie.
I'm fine right here.
Oh, hell. What do you want?
Come. Let me help you.
Madea!
Is that where you two met?
Yes I am mom Yes
- You're sexy to me. - Will you hush?
and they went on 'cause they was expecting the holy child.
I need some help!
It's all these strange people in this house, that's what it is.
Oliver, this is so funny.
You fire her. Right now.
Uh-uh. You not no farmer in the dell now.
and that you defend him in front of those other kids, so thank you.
I know. I'm sorry.
The little kid? He's too big for that.
You put all of this stuff in front of that door.
You know she went to New York to get a degree...
- Can I help? I'm good in the kitchen. - No, I don't need your help.
That ain't no problem. Children grow up.
Hold on a second, Bailey.
You don't gotta break her and snap her neck.
I rushed home. How's my mother?
so that you will be comfortable.
Folks around here don't take too kindly to politicians not keeping their word.
The air pressure coming out of one of them big rigs.
Come on. That guy had it comin', and everybody knows it.
No, honey. Eileen, you better tell her.
Go ahead and laugh. This is awful.
Cora asked me for some money for some dolls named Starz.
I'm so happy you all came back here to take care of it.
What you planning on doing?
So I spoke with my boss and got the money in advance.
What's the problem?
Let me get the eye lines clean...
- Mama, calm down. - Put your finger down...
- Poinsettias. - Stop. Do I look stupid?
- Mama, stop it! Stop! - No!
- I'll have to go to the bathroom soon. - Okay, go in the bush.
Don't sit by me dirty asshole you are so dirty and you shut the fukk up slob on this knob and lick my nutt too you Extra terrestrial Hershey's Reese's kit kat eating fake ass Gwyneth Paltrow acting Feminine ass bitch
- What? - I'm a truck driver.
Everybody in the USA knows what a memoriam is...
He'd kick ass out of a dwarf.
- Are you ready to go? - Yes, sure.
If you put some Viagra in that tree's water, it'll stay up all year.
My father was killed by a white man on Christmas Eve...
Get out on that plow.
- What about Tanner? - Nothing.
- It's a beautiful day at Tip... - Tifton's.
Blessed.
he came through the Virgin... piña colada.
Five milligrams of Don't choke that ho.
Let's go in and play charades with Madea.
What world are you living in? They are asking for trouble.
Well, Miss Madea...
I don't wanna talk about it. We don't make those kind of jokes, okay?
Whole body language. Tensed up.
with all due respect, I don't think you do.
Me and his daddy never got much schoolin'.
- That was unbelievable. - Thank you. I mean it.
Good. She was such a tramp.
Good job, boys.
I brought some decorations from Atlanta...
Don't blame that on me.
- Y'all want me to work the register? - No, no.
- Hey, hey! - Hi, y'all!
Yes! Explain that.
I could use your help with it.
- You marched? - We wasn't upright when we was marching.
I've never let my mother down my entire life. Okay?
He was born to the Virgin Mary...
and went up the bayou for the Swamp Manor to get hitched.
Listen, Oliver, that was a long time ago...
I just woke up late. I'll be here on time. I promise.
Honey? Who the lingerie for?
Keep going. Help each other out.
- What did you say? - He told her to get her ass in the truck.
And you don't drive.
Excuse me?
I'm not gonna come in here and listen to this.
They don't make it rain at the North Pole.
- I look like a damn fool. - I'm gonna come in.
- My aunt Madea. - Hi.
Stay warm, okay?
Think I'm gonna go down to Harrisburg. Try sell 'em over there.
My gosh, they are white. Look, we are related.
He's still got it. I knew you got it in you.
No, Mrs. Murphy, I'm sorry.
- No, I don't. - Oh, my God.
- Give him his money back. - Yeah.
My leg's caught.
Never see color. Only see heart.
when you see a yellow ribbon on a damn tree.
And he still lives here, that Tanner.
Eileen, tell him we've been shopping at Tifton's for over 15 years.
- Well, that's just plain dumb. - You watch your back talk, Amber.
Remember, Buddy, kill her with kindness.
'Cause she like him.
Please don't tell me that's your granddaddy's tree.
- What's the matter? - We're going to have to ask you to leave.
That's the guy you hired to help you with the farm?
My daughter loves me.
Don't you know what that means?
Hello?
say thank you.
- You are dreadful. Yes, you are. - The truth.
Then by all means, you just...
- You got it. - Bye.
and if I laugh too hard, I squirt pee.
Can't do that until we have a contract.
Such a fantastic Christmas gift to the city, sir.
Madea, go home. I'll call you later.
Excuse me. Excuse me.
Help!
Wait, calm down. It hasn't happened yet. It's not done.