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Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips
He could have been a scientist that was gonna cure cancer or something.
Yes.
- Oh, my God, are you okay? - Dude. Come on. Come on.
What?
I bet he's going to fluff his junk!
What day of your flow are you on?
Let's get some diapers.
Please. She rents this house out.
so it's definitely a possibility.
You ready?
It's Alice. I forgot to call her back.
I thought that I was making people's lives better,
It's happening. God, you make me red-hot.
- I'm fine, Morn. - Oh, my God.
Looking forward to your vote on November 3.
- I just want to get my real estate license! - Shut up.
- Good to meet you, too. - This is so perfect.
- The owner is coming towards the house. - Oh, God.
And she was in love with another astronaut named Will.
Yeah, right. What?
They were designed by my neighbor, David,
Hello!
- We did good. - Got it.
How do you look this flawless getting off a plane?
Your house is so...
Stripper's here!
Fuck, yeah!
No, we're, like, completely free.
- Hang up. Hang up. - Yeah, I am.
I don't know. I mean, who knows if it will work out?
You are peeing.
- Oh, my God, he's... - Yeah. Yeah.
and it's already got 10,000 retweets.
- I know, I know. - Okay, I'm going to grab a chair.
Yeah, we'll just, we'll clean up a dead stripper, cool.
You fucking...
- I need one. - Yup.
- Yeah. - Okay, I got it.
Yeah, but you're never to blame, right?
What a story this'll be.
This is so stupid.
No one's ever said that to me before.
You want the meth or not?
I do.
- Here's some cash. - Again, a burner phone,
you text my cell phone immediately.
- You want to get Jess back, right? - Yeah.
- Safe home! - What the fuck is going on in here?
So, what do you think, Uncle Jack?
Then you got to sad astronaut, bro.
Oh, my God. How did this guy get here?
which means you're guilty of accessory after the fact,
When she first asked me out, I thought it was a prank.
Fuck!
Make her feel special.
You know what would be really, really sexy?
Nothing. It's... I don't know.
Hi. I'm Jessica Thayer, and I'm running for state senate.
This child is not my son.
A white dude is dead at the hands of a bunch of women.
She was inside me.
- I bet. - We'd love for you to join us.
That story about you and your friends taking out those criminals is everywhere!
We are turning ourselves in and that's the end.
Congratulations to State Senator Jess Thayer!
We're not in college anymore, and things do change.
- Are you kidding me? - Shit!
- Oh, my God. Oh, my God. - He can hear you.
- Well, what can we do? - Are we on an open line here, girls?
And he's not part of an escort company, you know?
- Shit. - Somebody answer the door.
- Pizza! Pizza! - Yes, yes, yes.
- Yeah, I'd go for a slice. One second. - I'll have a slice. Yeah.
- I absolutely can't do it. - Come on, Jess!
No, we are innocent, because this was an accident, you guys.
but I really just don't want to have a party weekend right now.
- What's next? - We should get the fuck out of here.
- Peter. Hi. - Hey.
Okay. Oh, my God, amazoir.
Okay. Yeah.
Here.
Okay, guys, no one responded to my emails
They're gonna separate us into little cells,
and we're listening to some remastered Fleetwood Mac.
This house represents everything I hate.
Al Gore is guest-lecturing next semester.
Do you not like my dick?
Okay.
Yeah, white women.
Ideas?
This is so weird, you guys, because it's sort of like
I'm so sorry. I got stuck at the office.
This is a big house.
Good luck, man.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
but you're a six and she's a...
I'm not even with them!
- I mean, we don't want to. - No, of course we don't want to.
I could feel her pulling away, but I thought it was work.
You're a goddess. You're literally a goddess.
- Is it the one that's circled in big red? - Yeah.
- Oh, God. - No.
- No, no, no. - Oh, my God.
-"I'm saving the world." - You know what?
- It's extra-strength, bitch! - Somebody call an ambulance!
even though I told you it was culturally insensitive?
I'm running for office.
- Build a wall. - I just, like, don't...
we're gonna talk about this self-wax thing later.
Yes, yes, yes!
- Simultaneously. - That was, like, in the name of Jess.
Now, by the power vested in me
Jess, you were supposed to catch me.
We're gonna return the Smart car,
Yeah, so, I call. She picks up.
Oh, God! No!
I just have to print out those itineraries for the city council meeting.
- What's on my head? - This is it.
to Romano's Macaroni Grill.
Mommy, do you have to go to Miami?
because you're so busy with Peter and the campaign
You had a bridal shower?
I know.
I love you so much. Please call me. Bye.
Alice.
Only two cups left.
who cooked his girlfriend and ate her.
You guys, you guys, you guys, wait, wait, wait. One second.
- Oh, my God! - Is that Peter?
- Wait, wait, let me send it. Send, send, send. - Put it down.
Castelucci Pizza.
- And one for Papa Bear. - It burns. All right.
She's going really fast.
And she's my best friend, and she's good and kind.
Jess, do you still want to get married?
If Jess hooked up with a Spanish speaker, you're gonna want to reason with him.
I'll leave you alone from now on.
I'm more of a middle seat guy myself, but...