HOT
APP
STORIES
QUIZZES
DISCOVER
MEMES
EMOJI
More
CREATE STORIES
DAILY
DISCOVER
PHRASES
NUDGE CLIPS
CONTENT REQUEST
LOGIN
HOT
APP
STORIES
QUIZZES
MEMES
EMOJI
STORY
DAILY
PHRASES
DISCOVER
NUDGE CLIPS
REQUEST CONTENT
×
Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips
Thank god I'm not in one of those.
- Portia, I'll call you. - Please don't-.
The parents all think that their kids' acceptance...
And I wished so many times that I could have told you his name.
Balakian, Jeremiah
Sorry, I probably should have warned you.
A selfish asshole. And I just wanted to come here and...
Recalcu Eating. Recalculating. Recalculating-.
Yeah, I sent you a few e-mails and left a couple messages.
Why do you have Do Not Disturb signs with you?
In fact, he's the most well read person I have met.
It's so hard.
Will do. All right, see you.
James, tours leave at 9:15. It is 9:25.
- James? - Ok, let's go see Princeton.
OK.
But I want you to be able to get by in the world.
...and the University to a completely undeserved scandal.
...but you have never tried to get a kid into Princeton.
- Great. - Goodbye.
You know, I went to Dartmouth, same time as you.
The boy. Jeremiah.
She actually walked.
...actually, we're going to be throwing a graduation party for a kid who I thought was my son.
Maybe I got a glass eye, but it some from working in a factory at the age of eleven.
Her dream is to be a prosecutor, then serve on the Supreme Court.
Nelson, take a corner kick.
Your breasts are sliding off.
They grow up so damn fast, don't they?
Hey Portia.
Then you could hang out and get to know each other.
Yeah, I'm great.
Speaking of rejection,
Jeremiah, there's something I want to tell you...
Why would I?
OK, well, nice catching up...
I've been trying to reach you. I left you a million messages.
Seemed like the only thing to do.
These? Fake.
So you're saying I should apply?
I don't know, it's just, Nelson and I have always traveled.
No, you rock!
I thought that would drive me insane but...
Bolton, Jesse
I thought I'd give contacts a try.
another penny to this university ever again.
And pass the baton to a worthy successor.
Well, take out your pens.
UNLIKELY
Should I be?
This is my third world development class.
Her family emigrated from Russia ten years ago.
It's OK. Mommy's here.
I know you didn't ask for this.
To me.
Just back from a boring recruitment trip. Uneventful.
...that's less than a ten hour flight from JFK.
The sad lady? That's not really how I think of myself.
Wallace Thompson. Twenty-one hundred combined SAT...
Jeremiah is also a self-described autodidact since the age of eight.
Did you stay over?
...who else could you be? That's...
Woof!
He's going to Yale.
And I know this is very sudden and I don't expect-
To say.
Students with blazing minds and hearts who will change the goddamn world!
I'm sorry, _ are you a senior?
...chicken and I will stop and get the famous bean salad on my way home.
no ninth message. Please call me back.
I didn't realize until I was very far along...
organically fed, well-tutored offspring.
I'll have a breast, please.
High grades, but low scores.
Wait! Polokov called him inspirational!
L...Hi!
...remember to be yourself, because...
I can't stand babies. They're repulsive.
mainly because I didn't know how other people lived their lives.
...and I know this is all a bit abrupt.
Are you Johnny's girlfriend?
Thank you so much for coming.
- It's quite an operation you have here. - Thank you.
I'll give you ten bucks if you can do it again.
...while working on his father's reindeer farm and...
Suspensions, detentions, a Special Ed class?
Is he ready for Ecuador?
but she's originally from our beautiful stale of New Jersey.
I think this could help us avoid...
Now you need to go out and fall in love with yourself.
- Can I get some advice? - No.
- What the hell. - I'm helping you.
I'm sorry you feel that way.
Never start a folder if you can't finish it.
And 790, 780 and 790 on the SATs.
No, I'm in sixth grade.
She's captain of the cross-country team, sports editor of the school paper.
Have a seal, please.
...start calling me Susannah.
- I'll be there. - Good.
So, Portia, like the Merchant of Venice?
He educated himself purely by instinct.
I'm not supposed to discuss alumni recommendations.
- Look! - What?
I hate geography class. I hate maps.
OK, fine. But first, I have a question for all of you.
Yeah.
...I want him to be happy.
I got pregnant in college and my boyfriend had already dumped me for someone else.
or did you remember to bring your toothbrush?
And I've ordered everything, you just need to pick up the...
Put your hands together...
But I care about this kid...
- That's amazing. - Amazing.
You don't deserve this, you don't.