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Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips
No, sir. Not at all.
It's easier as you go down. He didn't know what he was talking about.
(PETER GROANING)
Okay, you just look really official.
-You came back for me. -Of course I did.
I picked up breakfast so we can eat on the road, make up time.
Don't move. Ready?
Okay, new rule: You can't...
The nicest showers.
Great. This is great.
That's too bad.
Hey, man! You just hit my car!
It's night. You're driving.
Darryl only made three cups of coffee...
That's gotta be a good sign.
Are you not aware that there's a person here?
We'll have to do that tomorrow. We close in five minutes.
The phone's ringing!
What's your name?
You know, I had this thing in my hand.
I'm more of a Ruby man, myself
-You and your friend. -Who?
-It's medical marijuana, Peter. -No, it's weed.
I’m not crazy on blends
Come here, I'll help you pick it up.
Now, do you want a ride to California or not?
That's a gang member, a construction worker, and....
-You're not the boss of me, you know. -I know. Just drink it.
What does that mean, "really an actor"? What is a real actor?
Oh, don't, don't, don't. Come on, dude.
-No, I wanna keep going. -No. Pull over.
Really need to get going. Pollard, what are you doing?
I didn't even know I existed in his eyes. So....
-It's been a real pleasure, Peter. -Been a lot of things.
-So you're an actor. -Yep.
One sec. Do you have anything else with your name on it?
-I'm handicapable? PETER : Handicapable.
-...when we get to California--" -Nope, I've never been to the zoo.
All I'm gonna do is say, "Look, we made a mistake."
First, before you do any work on it, let it work on you.
...and he picked them up, put them in the back of his car...
And I was ecstatic because he never asked me to do anything.
(CAR HORN HONKS)
ETHAN : Pita bread?
I'll keep it handy.
-Oh, Lord. Gosh. -What?
There's something I've been wanting to tell you I feel pretty awful about.
Yeah, there's plenty of him still in here.
-Breathe. -Ahh!
-You spent all our money on weed! -It's just another speed bump.
How about I call my sergeant in Fallujah and tell him your story, see what he thinks?
I know. It's okay, buddy.
-It's hot coffee. -Whoo!
This is not bothering you? The e-mails--
Septembrie 9, 2001
He looks sad as shit.
Shh. Pst, pst, pst.
Ring-ring.
And a sun to maybe dissipate
You know, ultrasounds aren't always reliable.
Don't panic! Don't panic! Don't panic!
It's about to get a whole lot worse.
-ln an hour, but you won't be on it. -Why's that?
What are you, a girl or something?
Did you get that? That was Shakespeare. Heard of him?
It's not because you got me kicked off a plane and shot by an air marshal.
It was just a big deal. I was so excited.
Sorry, Peter. I'm so sorry.
It's 6:35, sir.
I'm gonna make you proud, Dad.
...I don't know how I'm gonna make it without you.
Please. Don't.
Ohh. He's really cute.
-That's why I got the scarf on my head. -You were like a commando.
Sick!
What was I thinking?
I survived him. There's a difference.
Fuck.
-And you just spit on his dog. -I spit on his d-- God, I did.
FATHER : Whoa, whoa. Whoa, hey. -Who the hell is this guy?
-Absolutely. PETER : Great.
That's amazing. I had chills, like, that second paragraph.
No. I'm Malcolm X.
I don't know why you would, but you could.
The other thing is...
That's your new headshot. Ha-ha-ha!
. .
(SINGING) Hey you, out there on your own
I mean, this has got great body. It smokes like a fucking dream.
I was feeling vulnerable because of my father's death.
Come on, Sonny.
You got my stuff?
-How do you spell the last name? ETHAN : T-R-E-M-B-L-A-Y.
It'sRainingTwoAndAHalfMen.com.
I will tell you this:
Because he enjoyed talking to everybody that went through the toll booth.