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Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips
You know, I just...
No, no. No, no, no, no.
I don't want you to show the movie, I want you to be in it. Let me explain.
because we are going to bear witness to the baptism of our new members.
Bravo! Bravo!
I am 74, but I don't know it.
Boy, Mr. Lugosi, you must lead such an exciting life.
Hey, whose crazy idea was it to bury him in the cape?
that will conquer the world!
Okay. All right.
- Bela? - Eddie, please come over.
The soldiers' costumes are very realistic. That's positive!
Excuse me, Eddie. I don't mean to interrupt. I'm worried about the light.
This is gonna be Bela's laboratory, so it should be real impressive
But keep in touch. Let me know when your movie opens.
The incidents, places.
Oh.
One of them burned me on The Return Of Chandu.
Bela,
- He does? - Mmm-hmm.
I'm planning on dying soon.
You may be right, but it doesn't frickin' matter.
digging up consecrated ground to be highly offensive.
- Guess where I'm going next week? - I don't know. Where?
of the true story
What did I tell ya about watering these plants, eh? I want some water on 'em!
But now, the children of the night are calling me.
You're not gonna believe the first picture I ever saw.
But he's got a good heart. At the end of the picture, he saves the girl.
All right.
Could you please open up?
Have a nice cup o' joe, you'll feel much better.
I need your help.
Well, this is my way of telling you.
- Gosh, where'd they get real camels? - Hey, you!
who can shoot a film in four days and make me a profit.
I got a little surprise for you.
I see the usual gang of misfits and dope addicts are here.
and now that it's done, so am I.
And they're always trying to cast their buddies.
Come on, it's gonna be a big event,
Take care.
You know, I never thought of that.
Janet Lawton is clearly the part to play.
- The big picture? - Yes.
that will conquer the world!
from the dead!
How can you just walk around like that in front of all these people?
- Janet, still on the monster hunt? - What do you think?
but all I have is a fifty. I just came from my banker's.
Listen, the movie's getting made, that's all that matters.
Well, screw you!
I brought the script. You'll be portraying the ghoul's wife.
Let me show you something.
Okay. I gotta calm down.
It's not great, but I had fun. I like that!
Now, Tor, you're supposed to tie her down, but you have an angora fetish
Listen, work some parties, hit the bars, and get me hasbarites! I need hasbarites!
Didn't you just make one called Bride Of The Atom?
And remember, my friend,
Don't worry. We're almost there.
I'm just a really big, big fan. I've seen all your movies.
The things that I find interesting.
You misunderstood, Eddie.
Don't you think angora has a tactile sensuality
but look, we are professionals.
Hey, I think I see somethin'.
- Hi, Janet. - Oh, hi, Marge.
It was your friend's... Dracula.
Don't worry, Bela.
- All I needed was a touch-up. - Hmm. That mole still shows.
I already gave you my three hundred.
- It's a darn good role. - That's not the issue!
became greater and greater agony.
The jungle is my home.
Oh, my.
A great man like yourself
You know that Christine Jorgensen freak?
I'm very tired.
These last few days have been
I'm here about directing the Christine Jorgensen picture.
I'm going to kill myself.
What you working on?
.... Appphhhraaa
What if I take a moment to slow down,
that Dr. Vornoff bought the old Willows estate
That's the guy I met today.
Oh, I hate having to wake up this early.
Oh, that.
I like to dress in women's clothing.
I beg to differ.
I've got something to say.
Bela, Tor and Cris are coming. You'll have fun!
Move it outta here, huh?
There it is. Paul, go unhook it.
- Great. - I want you...
So change the poster.
Now, Janet, I...
so when you get in there and fight with him, shake his legs around.
We didn't make a nickel.
Part wasn't sexy enough.
I'm, uh, Edward D. Wood, Jr.
Give this man satin undies, a dress, sweater and skirt,
My dear Professor Strowski,
Bullshit!
Number one: I want the movie to end with a big explosion.
Well, I like to think so.
I'll see you then. Bye!
Listen, hit the bars, work some parties, and get me transvestites!
How long have you been doing this?
- They had a poetry to them. - Yes.
- Yes? - You don't know me, but I'm Ed Wood.
Oh, to heck with you. I met Bela Lugosi.
What is wrong with you people? Come on, trash barrel!
They make you tall, and you're flashy. They want that.
- Edward D. Wood, Jr. - Ah!
Well, somebody misplaced the octopus motor
My mind's in a muddle, like in a thick fog.
It's about this guy, he's crazy about this girl, but he likes to wear dresses.
Well, maybe you're not studio kind of material.
Kid, you must have me confused with David Selznick.
I'll just get a double to finish his scenes
- Do you really think so? - Absolutely.
- Hi, Lillian. - Hi, Ed. He's got a lot of visitors today.
And I'm anxious to see it.
Beg to differ? A bloodsucker, right? I'm talkin' about my towels.
That is no answer!
But perhaps we could get together again some time, Mr. Lugosi.
What is the one thing, if you put it in a movie, it'll be successful?
Goodbye, penis!
Do my toes.
Excuse me, Doctor.
Poodle, you made it. I wasn't sure you got my message.
Shh!
Pull the string! Pull the string!