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Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips
It's a total shutoff.
♪ I love you ♪
Please, that's an old wives' tale, that stuff.
There you go. Were you here March 23?
- Enema? - No. She needs a pedicure.
Gail and I...
- Let him up. - Oh, sorry, buddy.
♪ This is the time of your life ♪
Listen, how's Rebecca?
and have a life of deprivation...
Looks like it's gonna be a full house this weekend.
I bought all that cowboy stuff and I bought the sports stuff
Shut up, you limey bitch!
Marry me, Captain Renaldo.
(shrieks) What is it?
- Mr. Faulkner? - Yeah?
♪ Please, baby ♪
♪ Always thinking about you... ♪
- That means it's time, doesn't it? - That's right, it's time.
- Shit, we're in trouble. - Oh sure, run to Mommy.
to my wife,
There you go. There!
it's beautiful.
- My water broke. - We'll get you another.
I don't want to brag. What's his name?
♪ Oo-whee, baby ♪
See, this is why I don't want kids.
Forget it. Forget it. Come on, let's go.
Shut up you butthole ?
So we hear you're from Russia.
No, thanks. No. I'm just gonna shoot off.
Right.
No, thanks. No, I've had lots.
- (kids shouting) - (dog barking)
♪ Like I feel, baby ♪
- Promise? - Yeah, promise.
I'll be right back.
Wow. That's quite a breakfast you've got there.
Sam, she's 25 years old.
♪ Whoa-oh, whoa-oh-oh-oh ♪
Now check your computer again.
I mean, I know I've missed a few appointments, but...
Nobody wants to take dance class from a big, fat pregnant lady.
- come here ! - oh God.
Epidermis? What is it? Epilady?
But I really have to speak to her, okay? I want her back.
Well, no, but maybe you could get your own car.
♪ If I could turn back the hands of time ♪
Only because I didn't want to upset you because you were in a fragile state.
So...
That's all right, man. I've been lied to before.
♪ 'Cause this is the time of your life ♪
- Samuel! - (gasps)
(stammering) How long have you been working here?
It's like people just have babies on a whim.
- We won't let it change us. - No.
Easy, easy, easy. Easy. Easy.
- Yes, I am. - No.
- Whoa, I got a great shot of the head. - I don't give a...
You can actually put a queen size waterbed in the back.
- The baby's ready. - What do you mean ready?
- What's the matter? - This isn't happening. No.
That was interesting. That was a key sentence.
♪ Oh, baby ♪
- Goodbye. - Thanks.
♪ Into wine. ♪
I can't stand it. I don't know why.
She left about 15 minutes ago.
I have these appalling nightmares all the time.
- I need some help. - Take a deep breath.
- The hostess? - Mm-hmm.
No! Please. Here, eat this.
One more push and you will see your baby.
You're going to inject that thing into my wife?
- You have a problem with that? - No, no.
- (clapping) - (Sean groans)
Sorry.
- It's like magic. - (chuckles)
restrict her movement.
Oh, yes. What brings you here, then?
That's right. She volunteers here. I've sold cars to almost every doctor.
You know, the lip and eyes in the right spot?
but when you see your child look into your eyes
Yeah.
♪ Don't think about the past ♪
or an eye in the middle of its forehead.
- You want to babysit for my kids? - Yes! In fact, it's brilliant,
Yeah. Right. 97% effective.
Okay, well, it is your choice.
I'm facing a lifetime alone
♪ This is the time of your life ♪
- I'll get the doctor. - Honey, how are you feeling?
Okay.
How much do I owe you for four minutes?
Don't yell at me! Please don't do this to me.
- I think so. - Yeah.
- That's it! - No.
- How are you feeling? - I'm okay. I've been a little tired.
We'll honeymoon in Paris.
I'm in a much more fragile state now.
Oh, missy.
Say to yourself, "Do I really want to become a parent?"
(screaming)
Get off the phone and drive, limey scumbag!
(tires squealing)
(muffled groaning)
Wanna come up for coffee?
Oh, no. I want someone else.
and gobbled me up like some praying mantis. Not for me.
- Miami. - Miami?
but the first three months were really tough on me.
- I've got it! - Oh, thank God.
♪ These are the days, the time is now ♪
- Yeah, why? - Shit.
that means, presumably, you can actually see his whatnot.
had a little teeny element of actual control about it.
Oh, it stopped.
What do you think of this? Take a look at this.
You know, just out of the blue, you say you're pregnant.
Talk to her. Christine and I never talked.
And your baby... your baby
"What to Expect When You're Expecting."
Leaving in five minutes, sweetie.
Maybe it's crazy, but I feel it living inside me.